
##1007451 Historical patterns repeat on many scales .... <p> It gets dark early this time of year , the time of the winter solstice , and it gets cold far too early as well . I feet that cold much more in my bones nowadays . It gets under my tunic and into my blood , no matter how many layers I wear Perhaps it comes with old age , as inevitable as the wrinkles on my face and the aches in my joints . But despite the chill , on this particular winter solstice night I stood outside among the ancient Temple ruins to watch the setting of the Sun . My daughter knew of my desire to stand out here on this particular night , as I 've tried to do every year since we finally returned to Earth . Some years I 've been too ill , and some years the harsh weather convinced me to stay inside . But I suspected that this solstice night would be my last . As the Sun finally disappeared below the horizon , I looked up at the stars @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ this holiday season one more time . The chill wind started to howl more fiercely , and dusty snow began pelting my face . I began to cough , so I hid my head deeper within my parka and walked back through the darkness to the shelter of my firmly dwelling , just a hundred meters away . The temperature started to dip far below freezing , but I did not regret my decision to come outside . After all , this night was special , and not just because of the solstice . This night was also the anniversary of our victory over the Leyens . The door of our home slid open slowly and got stuck , so I had to push it to get it to open all the way . My son-in-law had been meaning to fix it , but other , more necessary repairs had taken precedence . I walked inside and discovered my daughter standing in our foyer , waiting for me with a slight scowl . " Abba , " she said , cutting past me to push the door closed . The word @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Hannah only calls me that when she 's annoyed . " Yes , daughter ? " I said with a smile . " You should n't go out at night . I was getting worried . We all were . " She helped me remove my parka and she ushered me towards the retaining fireplace , where a small log burned and gave off a mild heat . " I do n't have many more nights left , Hannah . Let me enjoy them . " " I was afraid you would n't come back , " she said softly She hung my parka in the closet . " We need you tonight . For the telling of the story . " " I know , I know . I 'm here , are n't I ? " She adjusted the kerchief that covered her hair . " Come . The others are waiting . " As we walked into the parlor , the smell of frying potato pancakes wafted in from the kitchen , filling my nose . My mouth watered . The smells mixed with the sounds of my @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ the floor where they played their game of spinning tops . An oil lamp bathed the room in a dull glow . As Hannah scurried past me to the kitchen , I tiptoed around the circle and settled in my easy chair , near the parlor fireplace . Just as I fell onto the cushions , my grandchildren looked up from their game . " Grampa 's here ! " little Jacob shouted , and he jumped towards me , laughing . A grandfather should n't play favorites , I suppose , but I 've always favored the youngest . Every new grandchild reminded me that the human race would go on . Jacob hugged me and tangled his fingers in my white beard . I picked him up and put him aside so I could grace each of my grandchildren with a hug . When I was done , the circle of children had reformed , gathered around me . Hannah came in from the kitchen , wiping her hands on a worn blue cloth . Her husband Shimon followed her in . The two of them sat in the @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ I smiled back . " Jacob , " I said , " what night is it ? " " The first night of the Festival of Lights ! " he replied . I addressed the oldest , who was fifteen . " Shmuel , what do we do for the Festival of Lights ? " Shmuel had answered this question many times before . " We play the tops game . We eat potato pancakes and other fried foods . We light the candles . And we tell the story . " I nodded . " Do you want to hear the story ? " The children clamored for the tale , and so I began . The story begins long ago I said , back when I was a very young man . Almost as young as all of you . It was a bad time for the human race . Some of us had spread out among the stars , but most of us lived on Babylon , a planet many light-years from here . And no matter where we lived , none of those planets were home . @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ we left Earth . And the answer should strike fear into all your hearts . It was because of the Leyens . Many years ago , as many years before I was born as have passed since , the Leyens came to Earth and conquered our home . These pale , shriveled , large-eyed aliens came to each member of our race with a choice-either be driven into exile , or have our genes altered so we would become like them . The Leyens had no sense of morality , and no sense of individuality , and most of us rejected their misguided offer . Some of us were weak , though , and I spit on their memory . Those who became assimilated started taking the Leyen point of view , wondering why we were so attached to this ball of dirt we called home . They were the ones , these Leyen -- Human hybrids , who drove us into exile on the planet Babylon . And so , from my grandfather 's time until my own , we lived on a planet that we did not know , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ , winter , and autumn did not mean what they had here on Earth . We scraped out a life for humanity and wept for the world we had once known . One day , we heard news that filled us with both fear and joy . The Leyens were not the only aliens out there . Far from here , closer to the center of the Milky Way , the Leyens were fighting with another race , one that they had tried to assimilate but that had not grown as weak and complacent as we had . The war had come , and with it , our opportunity . My father , Matthew , the Governor of our planet of exile , called me to his office one morning and said , " Judah , this is our chance . " " What is ? " I asked him . He looked around the room as if checking for electronic spying devices . " At the cost of many lives , we 've managed to secure six Leyen ships capable of hyperspace . I 've heard that the Leyens have @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ hybrids have left . This is our chance to take our planet back . " You have to remember that I knew nothing of Earth , except what my grandparents had told me . Like my father , I shared a desire to go back , but I honestly never expected it to happen in my lifetime . So I calmly replied , " Really ? Take our planet back ? That 's wonderful news . " My father cocked his head at me . " I 'm glad you think so , Judah , because I 'd like you to lead the fleet . " That stopped me cold . " Father , " I said , " I 'm a physics teacher . I 'm not a soldier . " " None of us are soldiers , " my father replied . " But you are my son . Your name will inspire our people and lead us into victory . " I had never heard my father speak that way , and I thought I saw tears begin to well up in his eyes . He wiped his @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ , he quickly stopped . " Will you do it , Judah ? " " Well , " I began , " I -- " The door opened , and one of my father 's aides interrupted us . " Governor Hammer , " he said with a nod . " Forgive the interruption . " " What is it , David ? " David glanced at me and said , " We 've just gotten a report confirming that the Leyens have temporarily abandoned Earth . It 's ours now if we want it . " " Thank you , David . " David left and my father turned back to me . " You see , Judah ? You do n't have to worry about being a soldier at all . Just lead the fleet back to Earth , and begin to recolonize home . " Father 's words convinced me , and I agreed to take on the task . He put me in charge of the most important ship of all , the largest and most powerful , called the Luminary . We jumped into hyperspace behind @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ to Earth . And protect them we did . Because what we did n't know at the time was that the Leyens had set up a trap . My grandchildren , my biggest hope for you is that you never know the terror of a battle . Shortly after the jump into hyperspace , we discovered that the Leyens had expected us . They had left one ship hidden near Babylon , just in case , and when they saw our six vessels , that one ship came in behind us for a surprise attack . We were hit first , with a huge energy burst that knocked out our life support and lights for a moment . By the time my crew had gotten the systems working again , the Leyens were firing random bolts at our other five ships . Over the hyperspace radio , I ordered the other five vessels to hightail it towards Earth as fast as possible . The Leyens must have overheard , because their ship turned around and sped towards us . We came in fast and engaged the Leyens in a volley of @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ remember the number of times we hit them or the number of times we got hit ourselves . The Luminary shook constantly , the lights dimmed and brightened over and over , and the control panels expelled sweet-smelling smoke . Finally , with our last dregs of energy , we managed to hit the Leyen ship dead center , and it exploded in the eerie silence that accompanies such things in hyperspace . I felt exhausted ; sweat covered my face and a bloody gash cut across my cheek . But my father had placed me in command , so I had to secure the Luminary before getting some rest . My crew reported on the damage , which mostly sound ed fixable , until I got a call in from my engineer . " Captain Hammer , we need you down here . " I remember shaking my head in amusement at being called " Captain Hammer , " but after making sure that there were no other crises for me to deal with , I headed down to engineering . The Leyen hyperspace engine filled the chamber from top @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ engineer , a woman about my age named Rebecca , pushed a button on the side of the engine that popped out a cube the size of my palm . She took it and handed it over to me . " Here 's the problem , Captain . " I turned the cube around in my hands . " It 's the fuel pod . " " Look at it closely , " Rebecca said . " It 's fused . Inoperable . " I examined it ; sure enough , the normal bright glow of the fuel pod had dimmed to a milky-white paleness . I passed it back to her . " Why did it fuse ? We did n't run the ship that hard . " Rebecca nodded . " That last energy burst , the one that did n't shake the ship-it must be some new sort of weapon . My guess is that it targeted the engine chamber and sapped the fuel pod . " " Well , put in a replacement . " She shook her head and pushed a but ton to open up @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ children , this is the part that you must understand . The Luminary was different from the other ships . The other ships could run for months on a standard fuel pod , but the Luminary used that much power in a day . Since we knew it would take eight days to get to Earth , we had brought eight extra fuel pods with us in the drawer . Only now , what Rebecca showed me was a drawer with only one working fuel pod . The other seven were as fused as the one from the engine , beyond repair . " Powerful weapon , " I said . " Yes . " " So what do we do now ? " Rebecca looked at me as if I were a fool . Come to think of it , maybe I was . " What do we do now ? " she parroted . " That 's what I 'm asking you . You 're the captain . " I nodded and stared off into the distance , while trying to think of an idea . " Can we @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ? " Rebecca shook her head . " You ordered them forward , and they 've already gone far ahead . They 're out of hyperspace radio range . " " Maybe they 'll come back for us . " Unless they assume we 've been destroyed . " I thought some more . " Well , we have one working fuel pod . Let 's use it to go back to Babylon and get more . " Rebecca rolled her eyes . " There are no more , Captain . We took all the fuel pods we had . There was no reason to leave any behind . " " So , " I said . " We 'll just go home , then . We 'll let the other five ships retake the Earth . " Rebecca looked around the chamber for a moment , and then , staring at her feet , she said , " With all due respect , sir , that 's not a good plan . " " Why not ? " " Because the trap implies that the Leyens know we 're coming @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ waiting for us near Earth , our other five ships wo n't stand a chance against them . They need us . " I sighed . " Rebecca , you 're telling me that whatever we do , we 've lost . " " I 'm afraid so , sir , " she said . " Unless we can get one fuel pod to do the work of eight . " Children , the way Rebecca said that triggered something in my mind . I opened up the engine 's fuel compartmeet and studied the way the wires connected from the fuel pod into the rest of the engine . I had never seen a Leyen power converter before , but it looked similar to power converters we used on Babylon . I studied the electronics intently and came up with an idea . " Rebecca , " I said , " what if we hook up the wires so it does n't drain the fuel pod as quickly as usual ? What if we adjust the rate at which power is drawn ? Flip the wires around so the exhaust @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ? " She bit her lip . " We 'd have to skirt very close to the laws of thermodynamics . But if we did as you suggest- " She punched a few buttons on a nearby computer panel , checked the result , and smiled . " We 'd have enough power from the one fuel pod to last us all eight days , plus a little more besides . " And that 's what we did . We arrived at Earth shortly after our other five ships , and just in time to set up a defensive perimeter around the planet . When the Leyens and the hybrids came back , in their weakened condition we managed to take them out ship by ship . Eventually they realized that it was n't worth it , and they left us behind to rebuild our lives the way we wanted . But my story , as always , ends with a warning . We may have been back home for decades now , but even today , we must still watch out for the Leyens . Their empire might be crumbling @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ and they would assimilate us again if they had a chance . My story was done except for one final part of the ritual . All of the other children turned to look at little Jacob , the only one young enough to not remember the punch line . " Grampa , that was the story of the Great Miracle , right ? " " Yes , " I replied , smiling . " So what was the Great Miracle ? " " What was the Great Miracle ? " I laughed . " Is n't it miracle enough that we won our planet back ? " " Seriously , Grampa , what was it ? " Still smiling , I sighed . " The Great Miracle was that I was wrong . " " What do you mean , you were wrong ? " Jacob asked . " The technique I came up with for getting more power out of the fuel pod-it could n't have worked . After the battle had been won , we checked the power converter and discovered that it was the wrong kind . It @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ what I had thought was a sliding power scale actually only had two settings , on and off . The physics just was n't there . It should n't have worked . " Jacob looked confused . " But it did work , Grampa . " I smiled . " Ah , yes , it did . And that is why we call it the Great Miracle . Come , let us light the candles . " My children followed me over to the mantelpiece , where Hannah had already set up the candelabrum . We lit the eight candles using the flame of a ninth , and recited those ancient words , " Nes Gadol Hayah Po-A Great Miracle Happened Here . " Then my daughter called everyone else over to the table to eat the potato pancakes , while I went to my room for a rest . As I changed into pajamas , I gazed for a long time at the photo of Rebecca , the engineer I had met on the Luminary so long ago . I hoped she would be proud of the way I told @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ into bed when I heard a knock at my door , and little Jacob came in . " Grampa , is that a true story ? How can one fuel pod last as long as eight ? " He jumped onto the bed , sitting next to me . I tousled his hair , making sure not to knock off his skullcap , and sighed happily . " Grandson , I do n't know what to believe . But I do believe my senses . Look around you . We 're here , back on Earth , and we have a second chance to make things go right . " 
##1007458 When sexy surgeon Michelle Renard falls in lust with her-hunky patient Theo Buchanan , her seductive bedside manner leads to a pleasure prescription he 'll never forget . <p> Ever since Theo Buchanan , the studly lawyer from Boston , had started staying at Dr. Michelle Renard 's home , the sexual tension had been driving her crazy . They 'd met one month before when he 'd had an emergency appendectomy at the hospital where she was a surgeon . Michelle thought she 'd seen the end of him until her father , Jack -- who had been hanging around the hospital that week -- took a liking to Theo . He 'd invited him to a fishing competition in the small Southern town where Michelle grew up and still lived . Ever the matchmaker , her father had insisted that Theo stay at Michelle 's place . Theo had point-blank told her that he intended to get her into the sack , and that kind of smooth-operator attitude infuriated her . As much as Michelle wanted to tear his clothes off , she was n't about @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ was taking her to dinner , and she was n't sure she 'd be able to resist temptation much longer .... passionate persuasion " Did I mention you look pretty tonight " Theo said as they zigzagged their way to the bar in her father 's crowded restaurant . " I just threw something on , " she said , not letting him know that she had spent 20 minutes deciding on an outfit . Her father hurried over to them . " Theo , why do n't you go pour yourself a beer while I have a word with my daughter " Michelle followed her father into the storage room . " Is something wrong ? " " He 's gon na leave , that 's what 's wrong . This town needs Theo Buchanan . " Michelle knew Theo had been hanging out with her father and the local football team . Because Theo knew so much about the sport , the town now wanted to make him the new high school football coach . " Daddy , what do you expect me to do ? The man lives @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ attorney . " " I think you could change his mind if you worked at it , " her father said . " How ? " she asked . " I 'm sure you 'll think of something , " he said . " Now go sit , and I 'll bring out supper for you and Theo . " Michelle did n't have a quiet moment for the next three hours . She and Theo had just finished eating when the restaurant got so busy that she had to help out . After the crowd thinned , Michelle sat at a table trying not to stare at Theo , who was at the bar . He looked adorable in his tee shirt and jeans . All she could think of was having sex with him . Pretty soon , he would go home ; just like her father , she wanted him to stay . Michelle was so busy worrying , she did n't notice him approaching her . " I 'm gon na get some fresh air , " he announced casually . As she watched him walk away @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ He had just pushed the door open and stepped outside when she went running after him . " That 's it , " she said , catching up with Theo outside in the moonlight . " You win . " He turned around . " What ? " " You know what I 'm talking about . This game we 've been playing , the flirting and innuendos . We 're going to have sex , Theo Buchanan . The tear-our-clothes-off , mind-blowing , scream-out-loud kind of sex . All night long . You name the time and the place , and I 'm there . " Theo stared at her with a devilish grin . Apparently , she 'd rendered him speechless . She folded her arms and demanded , " So ? What do you have to say to that ? " " Michelle , turn around . " She did as he said and that 's when she saw her father . He was standing in the doorway , definitely close enough to have overheard what she 'd just said to Theo . late-night liaisons On the drive @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ humiliated . When they got back , they retreated to their bedrooms without so much as a good-night . Now Michelle could n't sleep because she was unable to stop thinking about Theo . She decided some late-night TV in the den might take her mind off her lustful thoughts , so she headed downstairs . " Michelle , what are you doing ? Its 2:30 in the morning . " He nearly scared her to death . Theo stood in his doorway , his arms folded across his bare chest . His hair was tousled and his face needed a shave . He had pulled on a pair of Levi 's but had n't zipped them . Michelle stared at the narrow opening between the zipper and swallowed hard . " I 'm sorry , Theo . I did n't mean to disturb you , but I ca n't sleep . Do you want to do something until I feel tired ? " " What did you have in mind ? " " I could fix you a sandwich , " she said . " Not tonight . I want @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ back into his bedroom , though . He took hold of her hand and tugged Michelle into her room . Once inside , he buried his face in her hair and whispered , " God , you smell good . " " I thought you wanted to sleep . " " No , " he corrected , then kissed that wonderfully sensitive spot below her ear . Her breath caught in her throat when his teeth gently closed on her earlobe . " I said I wanted to go to bed . " doctor feel-good His mouth covered hers in a long , passionate kiss that let her know how much he wanted her too . Her lips parted , and she felt a jolt of pleasure all the way down to her toes when his tongue went in search of hers . Her arms wrapped around his waist , and then her hands began to stroke and caress him . She could feel the hard muscles of his back under her fingertips , and when her hips began to move restlessly against him , she felt him tremble . She @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ his hips . " Slow down , sweetheart , " he said . " We 've got all night . " And that was the problem . She wanted more than one night . She wanted forever , but she knew that was n't possible , and so she decided to take what she could get . They shared another hot , tongue-thrusting kiss , and then he pulled away , stepped back , and stripped off his jeans . The sight of his naked body overwhelmed her because he was so perfectly sculpted . She reached for the straps of her gown , but he stopped her . " Let me . " Slowly , Theo pulled her nightgown over her head and tossed it onto the floor . He picked her up in his an-as and carried her to the bed . His fingers circled her belly button , then moved lower . She sucked in her breath , " Wait , " she whispered . " You do n't like it ? " His fingers were magical . " Yes .. yes , but ifyou do n't stop @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ . He was driving her crazy , teasing , preparing her for him . His head dipped , and he began to kiss between her breasts . He kissed each one , his tongue stroking her nipples until she was arched half offthe bed . He moved down her body , kissing every inch of her skin until she cried out with pleasure . Then he moved lower until his mouth was between her thighs . She clung to him as he brought her to a fevered pitch again and again with his mouth . But just when she was reaching the explosive brink , he stopped and pUlled away . When she thought she could n't take it anymore , he put his hands down there and began to stroke her once again . Consumed with the waves of pleasure still coursing through her body , she braced herself as he knelt before her and roughly parted her thighs . Then , at long last , he lifted her hips and sank himself deep inside her . She moved forcefully , arch ing up against him to take him deeper @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ again , then again and again and again . Theo wanted to tell her how perfect she was , but lie could n't get the words out . The intensity of the feelings rocketing through his body was too overpowering . She would n't let him slow down . He buried himself inside her , and with one final thrust , they climaxed while she held him close . It took a few minutes for both of them to recover . Finally , Michelle started to laugh . " Loving you is going to be the death of me , " she said as she traced the tiny scar from his appendectomy . " I can see the headlines now : Sex Kills Surgeon . " She leaned down and gently kissed the scar . " Do you do that to all of your patients ? " he asked . " It 's part of the oath I took . Kiss it and make it better . " " Want to know what my favorite thing about you is ? " Theo whispered . " What ? " she asked in @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ breast . If she had n't been so tired , she would have asked him why men have such an obsession with breasts . Then she suddenly realized just where his hand was pressed , and tears sprang into her eyes . He had placed his hand over her heart . Footnote Adapted from MERCY 2001 by Julie Garwood . Published by Pocket Books . <p> 
##1007467 It was just a year after her husband left , and Jillian and the kids were on their own . She wanted the holiday to be special , but she never imagined it would be a turning point in her life . By Toni Gerber Hope <p> JILLIAN PUT DOWN THE LAST OF THE GROCERY BAGS AND GLANCED OVER AT the answering machine . One call-she could guess who that would be . She pulled off her down parka and ski cap , hung them near the back door , then shook out her hair . She needed a haircut , she knew . When it was styled , Jillian 's straight brown hair had a nice swing , but now it hung limply against her neck . * She was right about the call . * " Hi , sweetie . It 's Mom . Where are you ? Shopping ? I thought you 'd be back by now . I 'm calling about Hanukkah . It 's next week . Remember ? " * Even when she was speaking to a machine , Jillian 's mother @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ , for some reason , choosing not to speak . Well , her mother was n't far wrong -- these days , all of their conversations were more or less one-way . " The first night is the ninth , " the voice on the machine went on . " I 've sent you some beautiful candles-dripless -- made in Israel . And presents for the children . Talk soon , dear . " Click . " Click , " Jillian muttered to herself . She knew she did n't have to call back . Her mother would try again . Meanwhile , she wanted to savor her time alone in the house , the few minutes until ten-year-old Jake returned from Saturday -- afternoon hockey practice , dropping his stick and gear on the kitchen floor , and his little sister , eight-year-old Annie , swept in from a birthday party , full of reports about her friends . December ninth , Jillian thought , glancing at the calendar . Actually , she had been planning to rip out the entire page of December . Now , if her mother @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ . December 29 : the night Ken had told her he was moving out , the night he had said , " I 'm tired of family life . " " I did n't know that was an option , " Jillian had replied , surprising herself with her sarcasm . Ken had looked at her curiously but said little else as he packed a few items of clothing and some papers from his desk . " We 'll tell the kids in the morning , " he said . Photograph <p> So it was final , she thought , her mind filling with a million questions . But she wanted an answer to the only one that mattered-why ? And that , Jillian knew , Ken could n't tell her . " Fine , " she answered , " whatever . " OF COURSE , KEN HAD N'T BEEN TIRED of family life . He 'd been tired of her . Throughout the past 11 months , he had continued to be a devoted father . Every other weekend , he brought Jake and Annie to his apartment . When @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ the kids and Jillian as a group , cheerily , but carefully avoided Jillian 's eyes . She ached thinking of that dark December night and of the time since . At first , she had begged Ken to talk about it , to tell her what she had done , what had gone wrong . But all he could say was that he simply wanted to move on , that he did n't want to live the way he had been living . Even at marriage counseling-which he agreed to try once , probably so I could n't hold that over him , Jillian thought now-he had n't said any more than that . And she 'd been alone ever since , going to work every day in the community-relations department at the local hospital , picking up the kids from their after-school programs , putting dinner on the table , checking homework , signing permission slips , supervising bedtime , and then sitting numbly in front of the TV or crying quietly in the downstairs bathroom , so Jake and Annie would n't hear . The door burst open @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ filled the kitchen . Jake stumbled in , dropping his bag and hockey stick at the door . " How was practice ? " Jillian asked , patting down her son 's fine brown hair . Jake shrugged her hand away ; he thought he was too old for her to fuss over him . But he smiled at her . " Good ! I made a great save . And the coach said if I keep stopping goals like that , I 'll definitely be a starter . " " That 's terrific , " Jillian said . Jake slumped onto A kitchen chair . " Are you gon na come to my games ? " he asked , looking not at her but across the room at the door . Jillian smiled at her lanky , athletic boy . She thought of all the games she had sat through with Ken at her side-soccer , T-ball , Little League . How many times had they cheered as Jake had made a great play , then turned and met each other 's eyes , so proud of this kid of @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ? " she asked . " Yeah . I suppose so . " How would they manage that ? she wondered . Last spring , during Little League , they 'd been able to avoid the problem because Jillian had taken Annie to gymnastics on Saturday mornings while Ken went with Jake to the ball field . She thought of other divorced couples at games-sitting as far apart as they could , talking only if they absolutely had to , hurrying away the minute the game was over . She supposed she and Ken would do that now . Would everyone talk about them , the way she and her friends had whispered about those other divorced parents ? She could n't bear it . But , Jillian knew , she would bear it , just as she 'd managed to get through all those other awful moments of the past year . Her father was right-do n't look ahead . " Just take one day at a time , honey , " he kept encouraging her . " You 're doing great . " It was her mother who was @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ start , " as she so perkily put it . A fresh start that Jillian had n't wanted and did n't know what to do with . " SO , HOW ARE YOU ? " HER MOTHER asked , trying to sound casual on the phone . " Doing much these days ? " The evening had settled in around the house . In the living room , Jake and Annie lay on the couch , watching television . " If you mean besides working full-time , running a house , and raising two kids , " Jillian replied , " the answer is no . " " I just meant ... any parties ... you know , with the holidays coming and everything ... " her mother faltered . Jillian knew what she meant . " Well , there was the Bring a Dish from Your Ethnic Culture " dinner at the kids " school , " she said . " And did you meet anyone ? " her mother asked . " I mean , you know , " any ... divorced fathers ? " Was she kidding ? @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ early , six o'clock , so it was mostly moms there , " she explained . " But how are you and Dad ? " she asked . Better to change the subject , Jillian thought . She 'd once made the mistake of telling her mother that she 'd gone to a single parents " brunch at the synagogue , and the interrogation she 'd received made Jillian feel like she was 14 again . " So , what did you wear ? " her mother wanted to know . " Anyone ask for your number ? " The questions went on for weeks-and the implied accusations . " They could n't have all been jerks . " Maybe you should have worn something dressier . " Actually , Mr. Perfect could have been there and Jillian would n't have cared . She 'd only gone to that dreadful brunch so she 'd have something to report to her mother . And all she 'd gotten was more pressure . She did n't want to meet anyone . She and the kids were doing just fine the way they were @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ be OK , she told herself , believing it , as the week before Hanukkah went by . During school vacation , Jillian and the kids would fly to Florida , to her parents " house . But they were celebrating the first night of Hanukkah quietly-just the three of them . For the first time in months , Jillian set the table in the dining room . It looked pretty , with white candles set against a dark green tablecloth . The menorah was on the walnut sideboard , holding two candles-one for the first night and the special shamash candle to light it with . Jillian had been tempted to invite Ken-for the ki &; sake-but now she was glad she had n't . She certainly did n't need an ex-husband glowering at her from the end of the table , observing that the potato pancakes seemed a tad greasy this year . Was she sure the oil had been hot enough ? Or worse , not mentioning it at all because he would be on company behavior . The kids were so excited about their presents that they @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ table . The kids-they were so sweet , helping her make the potato pancakes . ( OK , so the oil was n't hot enough . ) And playing the dreidel game before dinner , " just " cause we always do , even if it is for babies , " Jake explained . As the little top spun and landed on a side , the children won or lost pennies , depending on which character from the Hebrew alphabet was facing up-gimel , nun , hay or shin-the letters that stood for each word in the sentence , which translated as : A Great Miracle Happened There . " It commemorates the miracle that the oil in the Temple of Jerusalem lasted eight nights when it was only supposed to be enough for one night , " Annie explained , as if they did n't all know the story . " And , " Jake piped up , " the miracle of the Jewish figh rers " victory over the Greek army . The Maccabees . That was the real miracle . " The real miracle here , thought Jillian @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ whole meal and they have n't exchanged one angry word , and no crying ! The phone startled her . Surely it could n't be her mother . They 'd already talked twice , the kids had thanked her for their gifts , and she would n't call again to rehash the evening until much later , long after dinner was over . " Is this Jillian ? " a man asked , his voice deep , but a little tentative . " Who is this ? " she answered sharply . Would telemarketers be so low as to call on a Sunday night ? " My name is David Sandler . I got your number from your grandmother . " " My grandmother ? " Jill ian sputtered . " My grandmother died last summer . " Who was this guy ? " Oh , I 'm sorry . How awkward of me , " the man continued . " Do n't hang up . I 'm really not weird . And I do n't talk to the dead or anything . It 's just that when I was visiting @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Jaffe , and she gave me your number . Told me that you were recently separated . I 'm sorry that she died , " he added . " She seemed like a lovely woman . " Jillian vaguely remembered her grandmother mentioning the incident . Ruth Sandler 's grandson . Very nice , not tall , but a mensch , Grandma had said , with the same first name as Jillian 's late grandfather , David . The mensch , however , had never called , and then Grandma had had a heart attack and another and had died in July . " Why are you calling now ? " she asked . " Well .. this gets even more awkward . I just was n't up to it , if you know what I mean . I .. I needed to become sane again . " " And are you sane now ? " Jillian asked , surprised that she was even curious . " Good question , " David answered . " My divorce really rocked me . They say you 're crazy for a year . " @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ anniversary . " Has it been a year for you ? " David laughed . " Oh , now I 'm embarrassed . It 's been almost two years , actually . But I 've always been a slow learner . " He sounds nice , Jillian realized . Somebody I could talk to . " It 's rough , is n't it ? " she said softly . " Should we compare notes over dinner ? " David asked . " Next Saturday ? " Her stomach lurched . " Dinner ? " I 'd have to get a baby-sitter , she thought , and Jake has his science project , and .. " Or , if you 'd rather , we could just meet for a drink or coffee the first time , " David rushed on . " I could call you later this week to see . " WOW JILLIAN THOUGHT AS SHE WALKED back to the dining room . That was strange . " Who was that ? " Annie asked . Jillian sat down , noticing the menorah on the sideboard , still glowing . @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ " A friend of your great-grandma 's , " she answered . " Someone she met before she died . " The kids looked blank , so Jillian explained , telling them about the " nice man " and Great-grandma 's friend and , even though she had n't planned to , about the dinner invitation too . Amazingly , they seemed pleased . " Cool , " Jake said , then returned to his new video game . " Ooh , what 'll you wear ? " Annie asked , excited . " Can we go up to your closet and pick out an outfit ? Maybe your red silk blouse . You have n't worn that in ages . " She was right . Jillian never wore anything bright or dressy anymore . " Maybe , " she said , as they walked toward the stairs . Then , to her astonishment , she started laughing . WHEN THE PHONE RANG-ONE LAST time that night-Jillian was ready . " Guess what ? " she said to her mother , repeating the whole incredible story . " Are n't I @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ No . I 'd say he 's the lucky one , " her mom answered warmly . Jillian , still smiling as she went downstairs to straighten the dining room and pick up the gift wrap , stopped before the menorah for a moment . A miracle had happened , she thought . Maybe not as glorious as the Maccabean victory or as inspiring as the oil lasting for eight nights , but a miracle all the same . " Thanks , Grandma , " she whispered as she switched off the hall light and started toward the stairs . I will wear my red silk blouse , she thought as she walked up to her sleeping family . And I 'll get my hair cut too . Author Affiliation Toni Gerber Hope is Good Housekeeping 5 news director . She lives in New York City with her husband and son . This is her first short story . <p> 
##1007468 It came in an envelope , buried deep in my mother 's papersthe true story of my grandfather . Uncovering his secret changed my feelings about Christmas ... and other things . By Joanna Trollope <p> When my mother died , she left me a bookstore . In England , it would be called a bookshop , but I prefer the word store . It suggests a treasure house to me , a place full of riches and surprises . - My mother 's bookstore is in a town a hundred miles east of Seattle and a hundred miles south of the Canadian border . The town was settled by Scandinavians in the nineteenth century , and if it has a domestic symbol , it must be a coffeepot . The whole town is cray about coffe , addictec to it . There is a coffee shop , one of a national chain , opposite my mother 's bookstore , and all day long , people run in and out of it for pints and quarts of coffee in giant Styrofoam cups , carrying them back to their @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ greed . Although she never said so , I believe my mother opened her store to console herself for disappointment in marriage . She was English and not of a generation to abandon a bad marriage . In any case , my grandmother had been a Catholic and a pious woman , and she had instilled in my mother that vows were vows . My grandmother died when my mother was 20-leaving her in the care of my grandfather , a good-natured , romantic man who managed a small , pretty little theater in northern England , in Yorkshire . He had no religion , my mother said , but he had dreams . Once , I knew , his dreams had gotten him into serious trouble , but of that my mother would say nothing . Sometimes I wonder if I take after him . I am not a religious woman in any way , but I have noticed that I occasionally give way to dreams . My most intense dream came when I was 24 and contemplating a move from Seattle to Boston to work in a publishing house @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ fell in love with a man in our town who was married with three children . I had known him all my life , and I fell in love with a violence that quite terrified me . We had an affair , all one summer ; I shall never forget it . And then , suddenly , he told me it was impossible , it was over , he was leaving . He collected his wife and children and took off to North Carolina , where he vanished , like a stone thrown into a pool . I still can not look at weather maps on television with any equanimity when the forecaster 's hand sweeps over the southeastern states . <p> After the death of that dream , I moved from my own apartment back in with my mother , above the store . She redecorated my old bedroom and gave me customers to look after and shelves to dust and arrange . My father , by then , was living in a condo in Seattle . My mother had settled him there , along with his typewriter and his @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ of one day becoming a renowned novelist , a chronicler of his time and the Pacific Northwest . It was those declarations that had once made my mother fall in love with him . And , I believe , it was those same declarations , after 20 years of talk , drink , and unfinished manuscripts , that finally set her teeth on edge . My mother had been determined to make a bookstore unlike any bookstore she had known in her English childhood . They were stiff , hushed places , she said , where one whispered as if in church and was not allowed to touch books without specific intention of purchase . My mother 's bookstore was in a converted dance studio-tangos were once taught there-and she divided the space with shelves to create a series of little rooms , where she placed armchairs and reading lamps about , even making a play area for children , with toys on a rug and a rocking horse . She made friends with her customers , and they brought photos to show her and batches of cookies and problems . @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ her customers . At Halloween , my mother would fill the store window with pumpkins and witches " hats . At New Year 's , she dressed it up for Scottish Hogmanay , with antlers and tartan ribbons . None of that I minded ; indeed , I applauded her enterprise . But at Easter and Christmas , I cringed . I pleaded with her every year not to give way to cheap sentiment , to superstition , but she took no notice ; she went ahead . Year after year , twice a year , I had to endure the spectacle of a pastel garden at Easter and a tacky manger at Christmas . My mother made the garden with mosses and spring flowers and included a cave built with stones that she collected on Sunday walks in the woods . The manger she 'd bought on her honeymoon in southern France , in Provence . It was made of clay , easily chipped and crudely painted . She set it up between two candles , in a bed of holly , and it caused me acute mortification . When @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ I could either allow the store to remain exactly the same , a shrine to her memory , or make some changes . I decided on the latter . I am a better businesswoman than my mother was , and although I have inherited her love of literature , I am neither alarmed by technology nor opposed to stocking business and computer books , as she was . I cleaned up the store a little-I took away most of the armchairs because too many people had become accustomed to lunching in them , and I did not want my stock smeared with tuna and mayonnaise-and I organized book events to celebrate a prize-winning novel or a major biography or a breakthrough cookbook . I held seminars at lunchtime and poetry readings at night . I started a gift-wrapping service and opened discount accounts for local schools and companies . A few of my mother 's customers told me the store had lost its heart . I refrained from telling them that it was no longer losing money . It may not have been as full as it was when my mother @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ and atmosphere-but I had three times the number of accounts . I had to hire a teenager to help with the packing and shipping . At night , when I finally closed the store and set the new security alarm , I would go up to the apartment and drink a single glass of wine-Merlot , usually-make myself something to eat , then settle down with a mug of coffee to go through my mother 's papers . It was an indulgence , a nightly fix as cherished as the Merlot . It took me almost a year and a half to sort through everything my mother had left-diaries , letters , photos , playbills , clippings , reviews , and notes and quotations scribbled on the backs of envelopes . " I ca n't tell you everything that 's happened to me , " she said before she died . " I 've forgotten half of it . But you will find everything you want to know . It 's all there . " I am a methodical person , and I discarded nothing before studying it . I read @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ labeled boxes . I put pictures into chronological order and slid them into albums . I made a history of the founding of the bookstore in a green file folder . I hoped it would be therapy for me , but it was the reverse . Every night , I longed to find something that would reconcile me to my mother 's passing , and every night , she rose before me , more vivid than ever , and I missed her deeply . I even feltunjustly , I knew-that she , with her English heritage , had left me stranded here , alone in a country which was my birthplace but to which , because of her , I could never quite belong . I also felt estranged from her Catholic upbringing . There were several rosaries in her drawers and a couple of prayer books , and above her bed had always hung a painting of a Madonna and child . I left all these things where I found them , but I would have preferred them out of the way . Just as I would have preferred my @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ scarcely in my lifetime even entered a church-not to have clung so blindly to these leftover trappings of a child 's past . It sometimes seemed to me like a dreadful falseness in a person otherwise so transparently honest . But we did n't talk about it . It was the only thing we did n't talk about . She said that there was no point ; she could see my mind was made up . Early in December we had some terrible rains . It was n't cold , but it was wild , wet , and windy , and the weather kept customers away . A businessman whom I supplied with computer books said that I should consider relocating to the new shopping mall outside of town . I told him I would then suffer from the proximity of a big chain bookstore that offered immense discounts , and he gave me a considering look . I could see he knew about the immense discounts already and was turning over his loyalty to me in his mind . When he had gone , I closed the store early and @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ yet for my glass of wine , so instead I followed my mother 's lifelong habit and made a pot of tea . I took this with me into my living room , put on the lamps , and pulled the drapes against the wet black evening . Only one drawer of my mother 's papers remained , and I was dreading the task of sorting it . The drawer lay on the rug in front of the sofa . I knelt down and lifted out a heap of assorted envelopes . One of them was large and bulky . It had come from a bookstore in Piccadilly , London , and had probably contained a catalog . Now it had a white label stuck to it , not quite straight , on which my mother had written in her bold hand : About my father . I untucked the flap and held it open over the rug . A shower of papers fell out , newspaper clippings mostly , and a memo , badly typed on sheets of thin white paper , held together with a rusty clip . I @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ English newspapers , some local , some national , and there were disturbing headlines : " Theatre Manager 's Theft " ; " Manager Defrauds Theatre " ; " Hand in the Box Office Till . " I picked up the memo . It had no heading , only a date : November 1956 . In 1956 , I was 12 , my mother 's bookstore was only two years old , and my English grandfather had been a widower for 16 years . I saw that the memo had been written and typed by my mother . She described my grandfather , so wedded to his theater that he was there seven days and six nights a week , dressed in a black evening suit with a starched white shirt and black bow tie , welcoming theatergoers into the foyer . She described herself , as well , going to the theater as a child with her father , standing on the empty stage , imagining an audience waiting for the show to begin . The theater belonged to the Town Council , which furnished a board of trustees made @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ a month , my grandfather reported to the board and wrestled with their lack of imagination , their deepseated philistinism . In the spring of 1956 , after 35 years of unremitting labor for the theater , my grandfather asked for a few months " leave of absence . He led the trustees to understand that he would be visiting his daughter and granddaughter in America . The trustees , much startled , agreed , as long as he found a temporary manager . He did find a manager , but he did not come to America . Instead , he went in search of a place that my mother said had been the dream passion of his life : He went , alone , to look for the seat of King Arthur , the site of Camelot . It took him three months . He rented a car and stayed in good hotels . He kept a comprehensive and scholarly journal which he bequeathed at his death to a northern university to assist those studying the legends of King Arthur and the works of the poet Tennyson . And while @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ , since my grandfather had n't troubled to conceal it-that the funds used to pay for this journey had been taken from the coffers of the theater . My grandfather was summoned before the trustees . He was perfectly open . He had no defense beyond his longing that had built to a craving to find the place that had so seized upon his mind . He was perfectly happy to repay the funds by working for no more than a pittance until the debt was cleared . He then stood and looked at those solid , practical faces and waited for certain dismissal and probable arrest . " And did you , " one trustee asked , " find Camelot ? " My grandfather admitted that he had failed . " Then we may assume you no longer believe in the possibility of its existence ? " My grandfather was deeply shocked . " Oh , no , " he said . " I believe as I ever did . " The trustees let him keep his job . " It was the only moment , " my mother wrote @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ he felt that their minds were in tune with his . " I put down the memo . My tea had grown cold . I sat there for perhaps half an hour and then I rose , rather stiffly , and went into the little room that my mother , in her English way , had always called the box room , where we kept the paraphernalia of our lives . I hunted among the bundles and boxes until I found a carton containing the little figurines for the manger from Provence . I carried it down to the store . There was just enough light coming in from the street for me to see . I cleared a space in the window display of Christmas cookbooks that I had arranged amid trailing vines of ivy and decorative pyramids of clementines and walnuts . Then I set out the Virgin Mary in her blue robe , Joseph in his brown one , and the baby in his bed of stiff painted straw . I added the shepherd to one side and the ox and ass to the other . I positioned @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ the coming of Twelfth Night . Then I lit a low light in the window . It threw a pool of faint illumination over the figures and cast their shadows up against the books behind them . I stood and looked at the scene for a few moments then went back upstairs to pour myself a glass of wine . I am not , as I have said , a religious woman . But I knew then-and will now know forever-the curious power of possibility . Author Affiliation Joanna Trollope , a descendant of Anthony Trollope , is a best-selling author in England . She lives in Gloucestershire , England . Her latest novel is Next of Kin . <p> 
##1007550 From the saucy new novel Spin Cycle , by Sue Margolis ... Headnote Rachel was engaged to another man when she met Matt , a ripped and randy washing machine repairman . Would she risk her relationship to sample him between the sheets ? Photograph <p> Rachel could n't stop thinking about Matt , the hunky guy who 'd come by her apartment last week to fix her washing machine . She 'd felt the kind of connection with him she rarely experienced these days with her fiance , Adam . As she sat alone in her living room with a bottle of wine , she reached into her pocket and took out Matt 's business card . For five full minutes , she sat , drinking her wine and staring at the card , picturing his grin , his brown eyes , his hard body ... She started to smile . Just because she was about to marry Adam did n't mean she had to stop appreciating other guys . it was n't as if she 'd ever cheat on Adam . Besides , when she 'd @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ was away on business , awoman had answered the phone . Sure , the woman said she was the hotel manager , but Rachel was certain she could hear a shower running in the background . She pushed Adam out of her mind . She did n't want to think about him and the mystery woman in his room . All she wanted was to hear Matt 's deep , lusty voice . Her eyes focused on his work number . It was late , so if she called , his machine would pick up . That way , she could hear him without having to say anything . She stalled for a few seconds , daring herself to do it , then spurred on by the three glasses of wine she 'd consumed , she grabbed the cordless and dialed . " Hello , " the voice said . She waited for the message to follow , but it did n't . " Hello ? " he said again . It was him , not his answering machine . " Oh , er , hi , Matt , " she @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ , hi , Rachel . How are you ? " Her drunken brain battled to drink of an excuse for calling . " I ... um . you know how you said I could call you if my washing machine ever broke down ? Well , it 's making the most awful noise and I was wondering if you could take a look at it sometime .... There 's no hurry .... Now ? ! Um ... I 'll see you in half an hour , then . " dirty laundry trick Rachel stood in front of the washing machine and drank the rest of the wine in her glass . What would she tell him when he arrived ? There was n't anything remotely wrong with the washing machine . Short of sabotaging it , what else could she do ? Sabotage . She repeated the word aloud . Swaying slightly from the wine , she went into her bedroom , picked up a handful of quarters , and returned to the kitchen . She opened the washing machine door , tossed the coins on top of a load of @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ , knowing full well they would jam the damn thing . When Matt arrived in his crumpled shirt and grubby Levi 's , she could n't help but feel extremely horny . " Hi , " she said , laughing awkwardly as she let him inside . " Thanks for coming over so quickly . " " No problem . " He smiled . " I was in the neighborhood . " Rachel led him to the kitchen , finding it difficult to walk in a straight line because of the wine . Pointing to the washing machine , she said , " The moment I switched the thing on , it started making this clanking sound . " " Let 's take a look , " he said , putting his toolbox on the floor and listening to the racket coming from inside . " Sounds like there 's loose change caught up in it . Maybe you forgot to empty your pockets before you put in your last load . " " More than likely , " she said , smiling anxiously . He knelt down and opened the @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ ? " " Sure , " she said . She bent over to help him , and Matt 's hand moved toward the door at precisely the same time . They touched for a moment , and their eyes met for a moment longer . " Sorry , " she said , pulling her hand away . " Go on . You take it out . " As she watched him , she regretted telling him he could remove the laundry . First out was an old , saggy bra , followed by three pairs of granny panties . " Where should I , uh ... ? " Matt said , holding the wet underwear . She could feel her cheeks burning . " Oh , God . Sorry , " she said , nervously grabbing the load and tossing it into a laundry basket . While Matt knelt with his head in the drum , she asked him how he became a repairman . He told her it was n't something he 'd set out to do . " After I left college , I wanted to be an actor @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ So I got an engineering degree instead . After I graduated , I took a year off . A friend of my dad 's asked me to help him repair washing machines , and my year off sort of turned into a life career . But what I really want to do is put my engineering skills to some worthwhile practical use-like in one of the developing countries , where I could make a difference . Sorry ... I sound like a Miss Universe contestant . " She laughed . " No , you do n't . I think that 's a great idea . " All of a sudden , Rachel realized that the wine was making her feel nauseous . She was n't used to drinking so much , and she had n't eaten anything . While Matt wrestled with the machine , she sat on a stool and rubbed her forehead , " Rachel , you okay " he asked . " I 'm feeling a bit queasy . I think it might have been something I ate . " He went to the sink and poured her @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ looking at him as she took the glass . Sick as she felt , she could n't help thinking he had the kind of sexy , boyish face that could melt her undies . He was just so hot . " Look , " he said , " go lie down while I finish up in here . " " No , I 'll be all right . I 'll just sit and watch . " As he worked , she sipped the water . Bit by bit , the nausea lifted , and drowsiness kicked in . Eventually , she could n't fight the overwhelming need to close her eyes any longer . She folded her arms on the counter , laid her head down on top of them , and passed out . unexpected seduction A few nights later , Rachel invited Matt to dinner to apologize for falling asleep on him . She had never done anything like that before and was totally embarrassed . He arrived wearing a trendy black coat over a ribbed charcoal polo shirt , carrying a bottle of wine . She thought about @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ that it might make him feel awkward . Instead , she just smiled and took his jacket and hung it on the coatrack by the door . " Why do n't you come into the kitchen ? " she asked . " We can talk while I finish cooking dinner . " He followed her down the hall . " Mmm . Something smells good . " He uncorked the bottle as she opened the oven to check the roasted potatoes . " Oh , by the way , " he said , " I thought you 'd want these back . " He slipped his hand into the pocket of his khakis and took out a crumpled paper bag . She peered into the bag , which contained her white lace G-string . " How did you get ahold of this ? " she asked , blushing . Matt finished pouring the wine without answering . Finally , he turned to her , holding two glasses and smiling in a knowing way . -The other night ... " she said , " we did n't , did we ? " @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ was pretty wasted , but I 'm sure I would have remembered if we 'd ... you know .... " " Rachel , " he said , finally , " I 'm just teasing . I found the G-string in my toolbox . It must have fallen in accidentally . " " You jerk ! " she said , trying her best to sound annoyed but unable to stop giggling . " I mean ... for a moment there , I thought ... " " What ? " he said , still teasing her . " C'm on , " she said , casting her eyes down to the floor . " You know . " Matt set his glass on the counter and moved toward her . Placing his hand under her chin , he lifted her face so her eyes were level with his , then he kissed her . Her body froze as she thought about Adam and their committed relationship based on mutual trust and honesty . But then she thought about that woman in his hotel room , and unable to help herself , she wrapped @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ You have no idea bow long I 've been wanting to do that , " he said . He pulled her toward him again and traced the outline of her lips with his tongue . As his tongue came deeper inside her , she felt a shuddering in her belly . She put her arms around his neck and moved her pelvis toward him . Rachel could feel his erection against her . He continued to kiss her , and as he did , she imagined his tongue between her legs . As he started running his hand over her butt , she got even more turned on . She could n't remember wanting anybody as much as she wanted him at that moment . Again , she found herself thinking about Adam . She knew she should put a stop to this now , but she could n't . As their kissing became more and more urgent , she was aware of him guiding her slowly across the room . Eventually , she felt her back against the cold metal of the washing machine . Still kissing her , he @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ no return " Oh , my God , " he whispered , running his finger over her panties . <p> Somehow , he managed to lift her onto the washing machine and at the same time pull her skirt up to her waist . As he began stroking the insides of her thighs , she leaned back , gripping the edge of the machine for support . " Bring your legs up , " he whispered . She lifted her feet onto the top of the machine . Finally , when the ache between her legs was becoming unbearable , he gently pulled the crotch of her panties aside and pushed two fingers inside her . Deeper and deeper they went , feeling her , exploring her . Just as she was about to cry out and beg him to enter her , he bent down and began trailing his tongue over her most sensitive area . She arched her back and whimpered . " Washing machine man , " she said , her voice breathless , " I think you may just have found my G spot . " Whenever @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ the pressure on her to a featherlight touch . Every so often , he stopped completely . Then he would push his fingers back inside her . As good as the feeling was , she eventually became aware that her position on top of the washing machine was n't ideal and that her back and legs were beginning to ache . As if reading her mind , he brought her legs back together and lifted her down to the floor . " Turn around , " he said . She turned and he made her bend over the machine . She was aware of him moving away and looking for something . Eventually , he found it and once again pulled up her skirt . A few seconds later , she cried out in delight as she felt him squirt cold hand lotion onto her butt , He began massaging it into her skin , occasionally running his finger from her wet behind to her front . She was just beginning to feel the quivering build up in her when he stopped . " I want to undress you properly , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ , brushing his hand aside , " you first . " Rachel kissed him and began slowly tracing the outline of his erection with her finger . After a few moments , she started feverishly undoing his belt and fly . He took off his sweater and tossed it onto the floor , revealing his ripped , muscular upper body . She tugged at his khakis then his boxers in a fumble of motion . She wanted to see all of him-now . His thick erection sprang forward , and she began to stroke him . She watched his stomach muscles quiver , felt his fingers digging into her shoulders . Then she knelt on the floor and ran her tongue over his belly and down through his dark hair . Matt gasped as she began licking the top of his erection . She carried on like that for a couple of minutes until finally , she took the entire length of him into her mouth . His whole body shuddered as her lips slid back and forth . " I think my legs are about to give out , " @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ to bed , " she said , and took him by the hand . When they reached the bed , Matt finished undressing her . He pulled her dress up to her belly and held it there with one hand . He placed the other hand between her legs . She lowered her head and let out a long , low breath that signified the pure joy she felt at that moment . He took two pillows and placed them , one on top of the other , in the middle of the bed . She knew what he wanted , so she lay across the pillows , on her front and kneeling , her butt raised in the air . She was aware of him on the bed behind her . He stroked her all over down there , occasionally rubbing her sensitive spot with firm , circular strokes , then pushing his fingers inside her . When he finally pushed himself into her , she cried out in delight at his slow , deep thrusts . The pleasure was so intense , she prayed that she would n't orgasm @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ to end . Again , she felt a quivering build up inside her . At the same time , his thrusts became slower and deeper . She was aware of him taking long gaps between each breath until they finally could n't take it any longer and both let go . And when it happened , wondrous as it was , she could not help thinking how much it reminded her of a washing machine in the final shuddering throes of its spin cycle . Photograph <p> Footnote Adapted from SPIN CYCLE ( C ) 2001 by Sue Margolis . Published by Dell/Random House . <p> 
##1007552 There is a relentless knock on my door . It 's Melanie the neighbor in Apartment 4E She talks without pause . She has been attacked . Wounded . I try to get the details ; she is almost hysterical . I fear if I interrupt her she may burst . My cat was in the hall . The cat attacked her . Melanie says she has been scratched . She shows me a small almost circular scabbed-over abrasion approximately the size of a pencil eraser head . <p> I ask , " When did this happen . " <p> She says , " Just now . " <p> I take a long pause . I say , " Melanie do you realize that Ashley has been declawed . " <p> She leans forward her voice deepens . " Just keep it in your apartment . " <p> Later that week I received an official call from Melanie , who is president of our co-op board . Our annual shareholder meeting is usually postponed for several months because it is so difficult to get everyone together . Melanie @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ a few days . <p> When I arrive at the meeting almost all the neighbors are there . Melanie introduces the purpose of the meeting . " The cat is a menace to the building and should be evicted . " She asks Bill to testify . <p> Bill says , " I was leaving my apartment and Ashley was in the hallway when I opened my door she was staring right at me . It was as if she was saying , Get back inside . " Several neighbors nod in agreement . <p> Melanie gives her impression of the cat : like an animal in the wild ready to pounce like you see on a nature show . <p> Connie tells of the two times she saw Ashley in the hall . <p> Linda is sitting quietly , her hand bandaged . <p> Amy is also very quiet . <p> They call for a vote . <p> Bill , Melanie , and Connie vote to evict the cat . <p> Linda , Amy , and I vote to allow her to stay . Everyone acknowledges that the doctors who @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ evict Ashley and so it is over . <p> I promise to keep Ashley in the apartment at all times . <p> Linda and Amy where prepared to vote to evict Ashley until a few hours before the meeting when Amy 's cat scratched Linda . Amy 's and Linda 's cats have claws and the cats occasionally sneak out into the hallways . Linda 's swollen hand forced them to acknowledge that my declawed cat was not the real threat . <p> Melanie 's behavior reminded me of the crazy ladies that lived in the neighborhood where I grew up . A crazy lady would talk until she worked herself into a trance . Then she would find someone to intimidate . She would put the evil eye on them and go into a rage . <p> When I was a child after I experienced this bizarre behavior I wondered if the stories of people being possessed by demons were true . I wonder what possessed Melanie . Melanie looks nothing like the crazy ladies from my neighborhood . She is a thin red headed well-dressed southern woman in her @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ . <p> Fortunately I had a friend who helped me . His name is Streeter . Two months before Melanie 's " the cat attacked me " story Streeter was hospitalized due to a car accident . When they released him , he was homeless . I invited him to live with me . <p> Streeter is a rugged , muscular , black man with a deep raspy voice . He could menace a person or make them laugh . For the past eight years he was living in the subway tunnels . <p> One day Streeter said , " We always go to your house . You never asked to see where I live . " We went to the tunnels . We walked to the end of the subway platform , descended a flight of steps , and entered a realm of rats , stagnant water , red dust , and the sound of trains clamoring in the distance . It is a place where demons are easily imagined . I was standing in a ditch below the tracks . The tracks were pitched and curved . The speeding @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ looked inside and saw ghostly flickering images of frozen people . <p> We kept walking until we arrived at a concrete bunker . This was Streeter 's home . It was filled with fat electrical cables . There where wooden pallets on the floor to keep him above the water . We sat down and Streeter told me about life in the tunnel . He called it living in the dark . He said there are rats as big as rabbits . Sometimes they would step on the third rail and get hit with several thousand volts of electricity . It would fry them and shoot their bodies up into the air . <p> He told me that after living in the bunker for several years he got lonely . He met a homeless woman and invited her to come and live with him . Streeter told her not to bring food into the tunnel . Food brings rats . If you spit , rats will come . One day he comes home and he smells chicken . The woman was up on a crate screaming . <p> Streeter says , @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ rats . You 're feeding them . " <p> She got mad at him . A few weeks later he comes home and there she is with the police and they 're cleaning his place out . Streeter walked away and thought , " I 'm a man who found happiness in a sewer and then I met a woman . " <p> Of course Streeter was the crazy black cat that Melanie and my neighbors were trying to evict . They could n't directly protest my having Streeter as a roommate . He rarely saw my neighbors and was always a considerate guest . Also , I was with Streeter twenty-four seven . We ate together , took dance class together . I went to clubs in the village to perform and Streeter accompanied me . I did this because living in a co-op on the Upper West Side was culture shock for Streeter and Streeter was culture shock for my neighbors . <p> Once and only once Streeter and I passed Melanie on the staircase . Streeter was kind to her . I remember the shock and anger in @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ saw when she talked about Ashley the cat . I also saw the grace and dignity that Streeter had when confronted with Melanie . Streeter 's dignity stayed with me . Every time I saw Melanie I offered her whatever kindness I felt she could accept . <p> All the time I knew him I never saw him hesitate to help someone if he thought he could . He was homeless and he had drug demons . But he was a good friend . He kept the demons to himself . <p> Streeter lived with me until his leg was healed . I was painting and sculpting during Streeter 's convalescence . Several times I told him to pick up a brush and push some paint around a canvas . He said he could n't draw worth a damn . Finally he made a painting for me . He painted a picture of a rat and a roach on top of the Brooklyn Bridge fighting each other for control of the city . After that he made paintings of African masks , landscapes , and portraits . Streeter paints all the @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ each . He is living in his own apartment in Brooklyn . <p> Streeter and I have a good friendship . We have learned from each other . Whenever I am having a rough time I remember what Streeter said , " They 're your demons , stop feeding them . " <p> Author Affiliation 
##1007553 Characters <p> Olivia ( " O ) " Smith , 10th grader <p> Tom Smith , Olivia 's brother <p> Tanya Hernandez , Olivia 's friend <p> Bill Patterson , teenage smoker <p> Sam Hansen , Olivia 's boyfriend , athlete <p> Mrs. Smith , Olivia 's mother <p> Nikki Mason , teenage smoker <p> Tiera Thompson , Olivia 's former friend , and a current smoker <p> Steve Jordan , Sam 's friend <p> Narrator : Welcome to our play called " O 's Dilemma . " It 's about Olivia 's decision concerning smoking . <p> Scene 1 : TGIF ( It 's Friday afternoon and Olivia Smith has just come home from school . ) <p> Mrs. Smith : You look tired , O. Rough day ? <p> Olivia : No , just three tests and an oral report . Just another day at the park . ( pausing ) Are you kidding ? It was the worst day of the year ! <p> Mrs. Smith : I guess you need to relax . ( Pulls out a cigarette and lights it up ) <p> @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Jim 's party tonight ! I ca n't wait ! <p> Mrs. Smith : I hope all your friends are going . Should I call the Thompsons and offer to take Tiera with you ? <p> Olivia : No , that 's OK . I 'm not interested in having her as a friend anymore . ( pausing ) You see , Tiera has turned on me . ( Flash to the side where a group of friends , including Tiera , are lighting up ) <p> Mrs. Smith : What do you mean ? <p> Olivia : I mean she hangs out with the smokers in school . <p> Mrs. Smith : I 'm shocked ! I thought she was a jock ! She was the big star of your ninthgrade basketball team last year . <p> Olivia : Well , I guess she got stung by Nicotine Nikki , the biggest smoker in school . She hangs out with her crowd now , and that 's not my scene . Godzilla breath is not for me . ( Flash to Nikki getting a cigarette from Tiera ) <p> Mrs. @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ than I was . Nicotine is very strong , and smoking is a hard habit to break . What time does the party start ? <p> Olivia : He wants us over at 7 p.m . I sure hope Sam is there . I have n't seen him since this morning . ( Just then , Olivia 's brother Tom enters singing . ) <p> Tom : Love is a many splendored thing . Especially when Sam gives O his ring . <p> Olivia : ( pushing Tom ) Shut up , Tom ! You should be so lucky with the girls in your life . ( Tom and Mrs. Smith laugh and leave the room . ) <p> Scene 2 : <p> The Confrontation <p> ( Olivia and Tanya Hernandez are walking over to Jim 's house for the party . ) <p> Tanya : I 've been looking forward to this party . All of Jim 's cool friends are going to be there . <p> Olivia : Yeah , I know . But the only one I care to see is Sam . <p> Tanya : You 're @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ . What more could you want ? <p> Olivia : I know ! He 's toy good to be true . <p> Narrator : Just as the girl 's turn the corner , they run into Bill Paterson and Tiera Thompson smoking cigarettes with Nikki Mason , the biggest smoker in school . <p> Tiera : Hey , O , want a cigarette ? It will keep you thin and sexy for Sam . <p> Niki : Yeah , he wo n't like it if you start to blimp out . <p> Olivia : I 'm not worried about that , because I exercise and watch what I eat . <p> Bill : Yeah , tell me about it . Are you going to eat carrots and celery at Jim 's tonight ? I doubt it ! <p> Tanya : Even if Olivia did smoke , why would she smoke with the biggest dorks in school ? ( Nikki pushes Tanya , and it looks like a fight is about to happen . ) <p> Olivia : ( shouting ) Hold it ! Calm down ! Let 's just go and @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ Tanya : Yeah , I guess it wo n't be much fun if I get a black eye . ( Tanya and Olivia laugh and leave . ) <p> Scene 3 : The Party Narrator : The students arrive at Jim 's party . They are talking , listening to music , and dancing . Just then , Sam makes his grand entrance with his buddy Steve . They act like they do n't notice Olivia and Tanya . <p> Olivia : Why do those two always try to act so cool ? <p> Tanya : They want us to bow down to them like kings . Hey , O , let 's do it ! <p> Olivia : Do what ? <p> Tanya : Bow down to them ! <p> Olivia : OK ! I 'll do the talking first . <p> Narrator : Olivia and Tanya sneak up to the two boys and tap them on the shoulders . <p> Olivia : ( bowing , arms folded ) Welcome , your highness ! Can we be of service ? <p> Narrator : As Sam speaks , a smokey odor @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ : O , how you doing ? <p> Olivia : Well , I was doing great until I took a whiff of you ! I thought you were Addison 's star athlete ? Now you smell like my mom 's ashtray ! <p> Sam : Well , I just thought I 'd try a couple of cigs tonight . No big deal . Say , why do n't you come outside and have one with me . Then we can come in and dance the night away . What'ya say ? <p> Scene 4 : One Solution <p> Narrator : This is one way Olivia could handle the situation . <p> Olivia : Well , Sam , I was looking forward to being with you at this party . Now I 'm not so sure . <p> Sam : So was I. So let 's go out and smoke one together . Hey , your mother smokes -- and it 's no big deal for her . <p> Olivia : Yes it is-and I can do without the problems caused by tobacco . Let 's just have a great time together @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ do you say ? <p> Sam : O , I guess you 're right . You wan na dance ? <p> Olivia : I 'd love to ! <p> Scene 5 : Another Way <p> Narrator : Here is another possible solution . <p> Sam : Well , I just thought I 'd try a couple of cigs tonight . No big deal . Say , why do n't you come outside and have one with me . Then we can come in and dance the night away . What'ya say ? <p> Olivia : No , I really do n't want to . <p> Steve : Sam will really like it if you join him . <p> Olivia : I thought you two wanted to be basketball stars . They 'll never let you go out for the team if they find out you 're smoking . <p> Steve : Well , if you 're too chicken , Tanya will come with us . Right , Tanya ? <p> Tanya : Well , just one . Come on , O. Then we 'll all be together the rest of the @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ to be more popular with smelly clothes and dinosaur breath ? No way ! You can go , but I 'm going to dance . <p> Narrator : Sam , Steve , and Tanya go outside and Olivia stays at the party . <p> Scene 6 : <p> Third Solution <p> Narrator : Olivia might handle the situation this way . <p> Sam : Well , I just thought I 'd try a couple of cigs tonight . No big deal . Say , why do n't you come outside and have one with me . Then we can come in and dance the night away . What'ya say ? <p> Olivia : I 'm amazed you 're smoking , Sam . I thought you had dreams of playing college basketball like your dad . <p> Sam : My dad ? He almost played in college , but he got in trouble because of drugs . <p> Olivia : And you want to follow in his footsteps ? <p> Sam : Not really , but I thought you 'd think I 'm cooler if I smoke . <p> Olivia : No @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ to stop smoking for years ! I ca n't think of one good reason to smoke . Sam , stop now before it 's too late . <p> Sam : You 're right , O. Let 's go dance . <p> Scene 7 : After the Party <p> Mrs. Smith : Well , how was the dance , O ? <p> Olivia : Smoke-free , and that 's the way I want our house to be . <p> Mrs. Smith : Here comes the speech again ! <p> Olivia : We all want to try to help you stop , but we know you have to want to do it . <p> Mrs. Smith : OK , I 'll really try to stop , but I do need your help , O. <p> Olivia : I 've been waiting for you to say that ! The smokefree Smith family is at your service ! ( Olivia and her mom give each other a hug . ) <p> Sidebar 